- Tana Mongeau spoke about her open marriage to fellow YouTuber Jake Paul in a raw new video.
- In the video which she titled “the truth about everything,” Mongeau said finding out that Paul had met up with his ex Erika Costell a month after their wedding left her feeling “broken.”
- She also said it was difficult when Paul recently released a new song about another ex-girlfriend Alissa Violet and posted an old photo of them kissing on his Instagram.
- But she said they are still going strong, despite their “psycho busy lives” and “trying to fit each other in” getting harder and harder.
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YouTuber Tana Mongeau spoke candidly about her open marriage with Jake Paul and other struggles in a raw new video, which she titled “the truth about everything.”
She said finding out that Paul had met up with his ex Erika Costell a month after their wedding left her feeling “broken.”
“I felt like I was opening my phone every day to something that just broke me further,” Mongeau said.
“Finding out about the Erika s— on Twitter killed me because Jake and I had so many conversations where he like villainized her, and I spent so much time trying to be everything she wasn’t.”
Mongeau added that she has been unhappy with how the media have portrayed her relationship. She said it was incredibly hard that everyone thought they got together "for clout and fame."
"I've done so much pretending I don't care when I do. I did so much of being the 'cool girl' and nothing," she said. "I think I just put so much of myself into Jake that I lost myself."
She also said it was difficult when Paul recently released a new song about another ex-girlfriend Alissa Violet. He posted an old photo of them kissing on his Instagram to promote it.
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"It's very weird now with all this Alissa s--- because I spent so much time thinking he was so hurt by it," Mongeau said. "To be fair, Jake did tell me he wrote this song, and that he was going to allude to being about Alissa, but I didn't think he was gonna post that photo."
But she said they are still going strong, despite their "psycho busy lives" and "trying to fit each other in" getting harder and harder.
"So many things keep hurting me further," she said. "I don't ever want to be on bad terms ... I don't ever want to hate each other."
Watch Mongeau's full video below:
Paul and Mongeau got married in July, in an elaborate ceremony that including a flight out on a private jet, a mansion, excessive wedding cakes, a replica of Jon Snow's sword from "Game of Thrones," and a mid-ceremony brawl.
It was later revealed there was no record of the couple obtaining a marriage license in Nevada, and Armani Izadi, who officiated the wedding, was not permitted to do so. The couple has both since said that the marriage is real enough to them, and have been working out how to be together in an open way that works for both their hectic lives.
Mongeau said 2019 was such a huge year for her career, but she was feeling the lowest she's ever felt. She said she felt like a fraud because her online personality is one of fun and honesty but there was so much she hasn't been sharing with her audience.
"I started this s--- based off of honesty because I had nothing to lose," she said.
"I wanted to die, I wanted to kill myself, I didn't care what I shared with the world, I kept it 100 because I had nothing to lose, and that's what got me where I am."
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