- Holiday party season is upon us.
- Business Insider asked readers to share their wildest work party stories.
- There’s a good way to avoid, say, chipping your coworker’s tooth, as one of our readers did: Don’t drink too much.
- Visit Business Insider’s homepage for more stories.
No matter how many times we warn you against letting loose at the company holiday party, some people just don’t listen.
But it’s important to remember that you’re still on company time, and how you behave matters.
As a lesson to us all, we asked readers and combed the web for wild stories of office holiday parties past. Here are some of the most cringeworthy:
Some answers have been edited for clarity.
"Our new janitor has no idea why everyone is treating him so nicely."
"There was this quiet, old janitor that worked our office building who was scheduled to retire on Christmas, so our Christmas party kind of included his farewell; we gave gifts to each other, put up a Christmas tree, people brought cakes and pastries, Christmas stuff.
"Then here comes the old janitor and he leaves a fairly big bag of presents under the tree; we're all kind of surprised because no one seemed to interact with him that much, but nonetheless we thank him and wish him the best and stuff, then he leaves and presumably sets off to the Midwest. The next day, we open the presents, including his.
"Turns out, the retiring janitor gave everyone in the office a little bottle of sulfuric acid. Everybody got one, even me, I still have it. We don't know where he got them or how much they cost, but apparently, he hated our guts.
"Our new janitor has no idea why everyone is treating him so nicely."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
A worker had to retract holiday party invites.
"My friend is in charge of a number of temporary hires, contract workers, and freelancers at an ad agency. Her company's HR department sent a mass save-the-date email for the holiday party to everyone, including the people she has under her. That was a mistake. She now has to contact each one and tell them they are not invited to the company party."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"The guy who brought the brownies grabbed the wrong plate ... "
"A place that I worked at about eight years ago had a huge party. One of the managers brought brownies and the director of operations (let's call him Jack) was the first to try them as we were setting up the food table.
"About half an hour later, as we were finishing up, Jack starts giggling and talking about how tall he feels. The guy who brought the brownies grabbed the wrong plate as he left the house and accidentally brought pot brownies.
"Needless to say, we gathered as many of the stoners as we could to clear that plate before anyone else got to them and tried to keep Jack away from other management."
"I won't be telling any more stories at holiday parties for a while."
"It was the first holiday party my office had hosted in many years. Naturally many employees were eager to take advantage and enjoy the well-earned libations. I was tentative at first, but joined the fray once I saw that upper management was fully committed to the good time, i.e. getting completely hammered.
"I quickly caught up to the pack, thoroughly enjoying myself and telling many stories, as I am wont to do. Unfortunately, I got a little too caught up in the moment and, at the climax of a particular story, swung my arms in the air for emphasis.
"As I did, my hand hit the bottom of a beer bottle just as my colleague put it to her lips, causing her to hit herself with it. After the initial shock had worn off and she cleaned up the spilled beer on her clothes, she turned to tell me she was OK, and if I wasn't feeling bad enough, my guilt skyrocketed: As she spoke I noticed that her front tooth had broken as a result of the bottle hitting her face. It wasn't completely knocked out, but it was chipped well enough to be unmistakable.
"I felt completely horrible and informed her of what happened, and she ran to the bathroom to confirm. To her credit, she was slightly embarrassed when she returned but stayed at the party and went out of her way to tell me that it was no big deal. Regardless, I still felt like a jerk the rest of the night.
"A few days later she went to the dentist and had the tooth fixed, and it was a relief that no permanent damage had occurred. But I won't be telling any more stories at holiday parties for a while."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"I hid in the bushes down the street until my significant other picked me up two hours later."
"I worked as a maintenance facilities man for a large school and foster home for troubled children. I showed up at the work Christmas party that was hosted by the programs nurse. Social anxiety troubled me a lot back then, so before I even knocked on the door I'd drank eight nips of vodka.
"Within twenty minutes of being there I fell down a full flight of stairs and crashed through their screen door. This happened in front of about twenty coworkers including the program's administration and my immediate supervisors.
"After apologizing and slurring profusely I told everybody that my ride was out front to pick me up. I hid in the bushes down the street until my significant other picked me up two hours later."
"His Christmas dinner was thoroughly ruined."
"Let me preface this by saying that my team and I love hot sauces - the hotter and more exotic the better. We collect them and share them around when we find a good one.
"My team went out to a fancy Italian restaurant in the Denver area a few Christmases ago, and one of the guys had gone to a specialty spice store downtown and bought some whole Ghost Chili peppers to use in some chili. He saved one and produced it that night at dinner; daring anyone to eat it.
"Being more on the machismo side of things, one of the other guys accepted the challenge and chomped it down whole. After turning redder than Rudolph's nose, and having mild hallucinations, he ended up vomiting all over the floor of one of the side server rooms of the restaurant.
"Needless to say many laughs were had by all on behalf of his overestimated pain tolerance, and his Christmas dinner was thoroughly ruined because he said 'things didn't taste right' for several days afterwards."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
One boss had an interesting choice of make-out partner.
"My boss made out with a mop."
"We noticed a coworker's husband half passed out at a table."
"One year, a coworker and I were about 45 minutes late to the cocktail hour portion of our company's holiday party. Upon our arrival, we noticed a coworker's husband half passed out at a table.
"He managed to drink so much just in the first 30 minutes of cocktail hour that he vomited in the bathroom and half-passed out at a table ... all before cocktail hour even ended. So embarrassing."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"I somehow was lucky enough not to lose my job ... as an HR coordinator."
"I had just started seeing a coworker only a few months before our holiday party. Before we were 'official,' I found out he made out with another one of our coworkers.
"When he showed up to the party with her and another coworker, I was livid. He claimed he didn't know she was riding in the Uber with them. Add an open bar and things just continued to get worse.
"One of the activities at the party was an interactive green screen that took your photo and then you could edit the photo on a different screen. After drinking too much, I ran over to the interactive photo booth, snapped a photo flipping the bird, and then wrote 'F- love' in big digital letters.
"Of course, it was caught on camera and spread quickly over the weekend. I somehow was lucky enough not to lose my job... as an HR coordinator. Safe to say, I didn't last long in human resources. "
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"It was probably the worst work-party game of all time."
"At my office party at my old company, the CEO thought it would be a fun party game to have everyone submit an embarrassing childhood story ahead of time - no one knew why, but we all did it.
"Then at the party he had them all printed on pieces of paper, and he had people read them aloud and guess whose story it was. It was incredibly awkward and probably the worst work-party game of all time."
-Anonymous Business Insider employee
"A karaoke bar employee chased him around for several minutes."
"We went twenty minutes over our karaoke room's reservation. They'd cut off the music. My boss, totally drunk, started rapping into the still-on microphone about everyone on our team at work.
"A karaoke bar employee chased him around for several minutes, trying to wrestle the mic from him while he continued his freestyle rap cataloging everybody's role on the team."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"Police came, but no charges were filed ... "
"At last year's office party, this 22-year-old kid got drunk and basically cursed me out in front of everyone. He then threw a punch at me.
"I simply stepped aside and watched him fall over. He ended up breaking his arm, lost a tooth, and lost a job. Police came, but no charges were filed as he didn't make any sort of contact."
"The next day he came into work with a busted chin and a bruised ego."
"One of my coworkers drank too much and proceeded to hit on our boss. When she got up from the table to walk away, he stood up to follow her, tripped, and split his chin open. The next day he came into work with a busted chin and a bruised ego."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"The whole office smelled of tequila."
"I had my interview for my current job the day after the office party. The whole office smelled of tequila. Two-thirds of the office didn't make it in. And those that did interview me thought I was already hired and were training me.
"Suffice to say, I took the job."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
One worker got an interesting proposition over coffee after the work party.
"I was leaving the office where I worked, a government department, so the end-of-year party was also a de facto farewell party for me. As far as stuffy office parties where the entire drinks menu is funded by taxpayers, it was pretty damn swinging.
"Anyway, about an hour into it a girl I had been talking to all year comes up and asks if I want to get out of there. 'Hell, yes, I do.' She says we should go get coffee and then there is something she wants to show me because it might be the last time I ever see her. I say my final goodbyes to my boss and workers, all lovely people, and duck out of the party before it winds down to go get coffee with this woman who I'd been hitting it off really well with, or so I thought.
"We get to a cafe, order drinks, chat for a bit, and the second the waiter walks away, she drags out all of these charts and forms - even had a little A-stand for her presentation - asking me to sign up for Amway.
"I drank my scaldingly hot coffee way too quickly and noped the hell out of there to run back to my party, but it was too late, and the only person there was the janitor. His apathetic continuation of floor waxing seemed to both sum up and punctuate the entire night."
"I never asked what I did to get this nickname, and I really don't want to know."
"Once my boss challenged me to a shot contest at the start of the night. I blacked out shortly thereafter, but when I came in to work the next day, I had received the new nickname of 'Steak Pants.'
"I never asked what I did to get this nickname, and I really don't want to know."
"When we arrived to work, the company was closed."
"Our boss made a barbecue at work to celebrate the first year of the company. We had live music, good food and some beers.
"That party was on Friday. Next Monday, when we arrived to work, the company was closed and the warehouse was completely empty."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"A memo came out saying if you were arrested the company would not bail you out of jail."
"Two days before my first work Christmas party, a memo came out saying if you were arrested the company would not bail you out of jail.
"A year before, several people were arrested for doing coke outside the Christmas party. The CEO had to bail them all out of jail."
"Everyone still talks about it."
"I was working freelance last year, and the production company threw a Christmas party at a pub near the office, where there were pong tables set up for flip cup and beer pong.
"Everyone had a few drinks, and another - tiny! - freelance producer was sitting on the ping pong table talking to this guy when all of a sudden the table collapses, beer spills everywhere, and she's on the floor of the bar.
"It's funny because she's so tiny and nobody was really that drunk (and nobody got hurt). But everyone at that production company still talks about it.
"As do I. It was hilarious."
-Anonymous Business Insider employee
"Fortunately, he didn't hurt himself, but strangely he resigned a couple of months later."
"I've attended many holiday parties throughout my career, but one will always stand out. It was with a very conservative bank in the late '80s, and the party planners pulled out all the stops - lavish door prizes, a full-course meal, dancing, and, of course, an open bar.
"One of the VPs, who was one of the most stern, buttoned-down guys I've ever met, got completely blitzed and started dancing wildly by himself, yelling and screaming, even doing back flips on the dance floor! Fortunately, he didn't hurt himself, but strangely he resigned a couple of months later.
"Sadly, it would be the last party I would attend with this employer. By the next Christmas, they were out of business."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"She was complaining to her boss."
"I saw a coworker complain about a recent assignment, then say, 'Don't tell Bruce I was complaining.' She was talking to her boss, Bruce."
"The gallery was removed from public access within the hour."
"After rolling into the office the morning following my company holiday party, I received the company-wide email blast providing a link to the photo booth gallery.
"After scrolling through several hours of tame photos, I discovered a series of 25 pictures showing my boss in a progressing state of undress while hooking up with a colleague from a different department.
"The gallery was removed from public access within the hour, and both photo subjects were sent to HR."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"He managed to stop her, but not before about 1,000 people looked on in amazement."
"Some years ago, we had our Christmas party at a local hotel and had some entertainment including a hypnotist.
"He asked for volunteers, and several people went on stage. He went through the process of hypnotizing them and ended up with several people in the state of hypnosis.
"The hypnotist then told them there was a big pile of hundred-dollar bills in front of them, and they could have all they could carry away.
"One of our employees immediately pulled her dress up and starting stuffing imaginary money into her panty hose. Yikes!
"He managed to stop her, but not before about 1,000 people looked on in amazement.
"She was a good sport about it, and we decided not to hire a hypnotist in the future."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
"The next thing we know, we were in a plane to Istanbul, Turkey."
"The company I work for introduced new end-of-year bonuses, and one of them was a trip to Rome.
"As a developer team, we won this bonus, and the next day we flew to the Rome. However, on the plane, we started to drink, and the next thing we know, we were in a plane to Istanbul, Turkey.
"Nobody knows how, when, and where we decided to go to Istanbul instead of Rome. Later on we understood that, in London (where we had to wait five hours for the next plane), we changed our tickets to Istanbul. It was nice though - beautiful city, warm people, and delicious dishes."
-Anonymous Business Insider reader
